The month ahead

(Bram about to board the USS Florida last year)

The Lillards are facing a very challenging month ahead. Bram will be on a submarine for the next 4 weeks. This means no phone conversations and limited email contact between us. Over the next few weeks Benjamin and I will be in Cincinnati visiting my mom and dad (and Jamison and Adam) so there will be some relief from the shock of Bram's absence. And when we return to Maryland, Jenny and Ryan will be here to make the house feel a little more full :) I am very thankful for these blessings, but I think I would rather have my husband home with us.

We have been preparing our hearts for this long separation for many months, but now that it is upon us there are new challenges and feelings to battle. We covet your prayers over the next 4 weeks. Please pray for safety during our travels, and pray for me as I enter my final trimester of this pregnancy that the uneventful trend will continue and no complications would arise while Bram is away. Also pray that the time would go quickly for both Bram and I, and that God would sustain us in this difficult period.

I look forward to sharing with you the ways God has been faithful to us during this time. Be on the lookout for updates on Bram, our trip to Cincinnati, and all the new things Benjamin discovers over this period!

The next post will be from the Nati!

The gift I have been given - A tribute to my Parents and Grandparents

This morning God has filled my heart afresh with thankfulness for my salvation. Jesus lived the perfect life I could not live and stood in my place, taking on my sinfulness and enduring the punishment of death that I deserve, so that I can be reconciled to God in his perfect holiness. And then God showed that he accepted Jesus as my substitute when he raised him from the dead. What a gift I have been given, first that this even took place, and second that I believe it. Would I even believe this if my parents hadn't told me of this glorious truth from the time I was very small? Would they have believed it if their parents hadn't done the same for them? These thoughts have given rise to an overwhelming gratefulness for the faithfulness of those that came before me. Their faithfulness has blessed me in ways that have eternal significance. Their love for the gospel has transfered to me the gift of greatest important - my salvation.

Mom and Dad - My words cannot convey to you the joy in my heart that your faithful adherence to the word of God has endowed. You have raised children who are not simply moral people, but who understand that their sin is an affront to the holy God, who have trusted in the finished work of Jesus on the cross, and who strive to serve him by his grace. I am blessed beyond measure because your words have always been backed up by your lives. Your humble dependence on God for your salvation and your very lives has and will continue to have reverberations in the generations that follow you. You have honored your own parents by obeying them and following them in service to God's kingdom. You have been instruments in God's unstoppable work of salvation in my life - and the lives of those you serve. There is no higher commendation that you can receive. Thank you.

To my Grandma and Grandpa Lyman, and Mimi and Papa Fields - How can I ever thank you for your many years of humble submission to God's word? How can I ever thank you for your faithful obedience to God's command to raise up your children in the fear and knowledge of him? Because you did these things - and still continue in faithfulness to this day - the glorious gospel has gone out and effected the hearts of the generations that have come after you. I am the recipient of an inheritance worth more than all the earth's riches. I am the heir to a heritage of humility, sacrifice, and service that outlasts all the great family names of this world because it has eternal worth! When you preached the gospel to your children, God honored your obedience and granted them repentance of their sins. This enabled them to preach it to me, and in God's great mercy I have repented of my sin and will live forever in his presence. When you stand before God one day, you will hear him say "Well done, good and faithful servant." And we will all give him the glory for your faithful acts in this life. Thank you.

I am a part of the 4th generation of those who serve God in his church and who are a blessing to the world around us. My siblings, cousins, and I (and our spouses) will stand on the firm rock of Christ because you all have exhibited it in your own lives. As we bring forth what will be, by God's mercy, the 5th generation of those who love God and his gospel, may we see his great promise come to fruition - "...that my righteousness will be forever, and my salvation to all generations." Isaiah 51:8

I love you.

Benjamin showing off!

Here's a video that shows off Benjamin's toddler status...Enjoy!

Mother of a toddler

So, I guess it's safe to say I have officially reached "mother of a toddler" status. Yesterday was the first day that Benjamin walked on his own for significant stretches of the day. I realize that there are still days of crawling and carrying ahead, but I am very encouraged that he has made the mental leap necessary to walk. He is constantly changing and learning from Bram and I, Jenny and Ryan and anyone else he interacts with.

Jenny and I were talking this morning about the time that he couldn't do anything - not even roll over. He was completely dependent on someone to do everything for him - I thought that was a busy time in my life. Now that he has many skills to accomplish his own ends, this is the truly busy time! I have to watch and listen every moment he is awake. Even as I write this he is getting into the basket by the door that holds all the car keys and trying to use them on the front door lock.

That makes me realize that he really watches what the adult around him do. I really have to carefully consider my actions before I even attempt them because this little one imitates everything I do. What am I modeling for him in my daily life, my interactions, my priorities, and my routine? Am I truly exhibiting for him the things of first importance - my daily devotion to growing in godliness, the priority of my role as wife, mother, homemaker? All these thoughts are borne out of my son learning to walk. It just proves that God can use the smallest things to change our perspective and challenge us to change. I guess the catch is that we have to be paying attention. I pray today that God uses the seemingly routine or insignificant things that happen to us to open our eyes to His truth and give us hearts of obedience to follow Him - just as my little boy follows me around today!

Outside time ("Spring is more fun")

We had outside time today. The weather was perfect for some frolicking good times! First we went to the backyard and played with some bubbles. Benjamin is fascinated by the fact that they disappear when he touches them. He isn't quite confident in walking yet, so he tried to crawl after the ones that got caught in the wind - pretty humorous to watch him attempt to crawl with one hand outstretched to catch the bubbles :) The other humorous moment was when I had to communicate to him that he could not take off his shoes while we were outside. You can see his consternation in this photo.

We also explored the garden which is only populated by landscaping rocks right now. It seems the last few springs have gotten away from me in the gardening department. I think I have a few good excuses though :) Benjamin didn't seem to mind, as he was very interested in the different colored rocks. I had to keep reminding him, "No mouth, Benjamin." Haha - he's such a boy!

Another very boy thing Benjamin is already expressing is his love of cars and trucks. While we were in the front yard admiring our crab apple tree in full bloom he caught a glimpse of a truck parked across the street. Let me just say the flowers couldn't cut it after that. All he wanted to do was to get over to the truck. I love how persistent he is at times - that is, when he isn't defying me :) We also brought his little push walker out front so that he could walk up and down the sidewalk. The walker converts into a little car, and he won't touch it unless its in that configuration. Even though he has to bend over to push it!

Overall, it was a very fun outing...other than the fact that I now have watery eyes and a runny nose :) As long as the boy is happy, it's worth it.
(Thanks to Jenny James who took the pictures to commemorate the occasion!)

Boy of many names

He has many nicknames like...

Baby Butter

Budge

Lovey

Buh-boy

Pup-pup

Jamin

Benji-boy

Bubbah

Scooby

and Muffin Man
(In other words, anything other than Ben.)

Cherry Blossom festival

On Saturday we went to DC to see the famed cherry blossoms. We took the Metro down to the National Mall and walked a few blocks to the Tidal Basin. We came early to beat the crowds, as we knew there would be many people trying to catch the blossoms at peak bloom. Benjamin is enamored of any kind of tree, and we thought that he would really enjoy the beautiful blossoms while they were at their peak. It was cloudy and windy, but an enjoyable day nonetheless! We did a lot of walking, but it was worth it to see Benjamin discover the beautiful flowers.

You see them here checking out the blossoms...actually, I think Bram was playing keep away, one of Benjamin's favorite games! Benjamin really enjoys any time he gets with Bram. We have come to call these "Daddy days" and I have told Benjamin that I can't blame him for preferring Bram...I quite prefer him myself!

There was so much to take in at the festival and Benjamin made sure we both took note of everything he saw. Here he is in typical Benjamin form pointing to everything of interest. He has become so aware of his surroundings and everything is new and interesting. I love how every new sight brings new discoveries and new joys to his heart. He has his daddy's analytical mind and his mommy's ability to take enjoyment of simple things...I think that's a good mix!

At one point Bram was tossing Benjamin up in the air - they were both laughing so much. What you don't see in this picture are all the concerned looks Bram was getting from passers-by. You would think that the moms would be disapproving, but it was mostly men who gave him the "evil eye." Haha!

A new adventure

For the last 6 months I have been in pregnancy brain mode - in other words, I forget everything. I am very distractible and have a hard time remembering even the most important things. This is exactly the way I don't want to be, especially in this precious time when my children are small. I want to remember and cherish every moment I have with them. So, in the effort to mark this special time for posterity I have resolved to blog.

This also serves as an opportunity for me to start writing again. The past few years have afforded me very few opportunities to put pen to paper. If you would have told me when I was a teenager that I would not be writing after I got married, I would have laughed at you. But often our realities contain in them responsibilities and new passions that we cannot foresee when we are young. This realization has been bittersweet for me. What used to be a habit is now on the back-burner. That needs to change. Writing needs to be part of my routine for it to get done. I don't want to waste this opportunity to find time for writing in my busy days before my days get even more hectic. I am changing physically and Benjamin changes every minute, it seems, and the new baby comes in July. My world keeps changing...that is the only thing that will not change.

Case and point is Benjamin's latest development. Enjoy!